Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
