Cold hands, warm shart.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize