so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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