So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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