so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
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There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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