but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
