I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize