I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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