I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
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