I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
