Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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