I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
