Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
