sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
