theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
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I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
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I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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