You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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