we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize