so explain again why im purple
no
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize