The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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