I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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