im drinking this country out of the recession.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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