I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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