I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
