at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
