I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
