Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
