shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
