help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
