is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
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chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
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I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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