This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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