my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
