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got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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