No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
