I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
