Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
