Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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