I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
