He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
