Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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