K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Dignity is for republicans.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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