so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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