Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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