Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
