So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
