Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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