the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
