If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
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