Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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