so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
