I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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