I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
