Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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