My balls are so social today.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
